We Arrive in Russia
16 June, 2002
Your correspondent here in St. Petersburg, (Russia that is if you are American and don’t know that there is another St. Petersburg in the world.) We, Tuxedomoon, are up here for a week or so, we play here tomorrow and then we go to Moscow.
I don’t have a hell of a lot to report about life up here in the former home of the evil empire. I have been luxuriating in the fact that I have my own room here in the Tuxmo Arms, in which I can sleep and SMOKE, without fear of brain-damaging my son. I can also read undisturbed and I have just finished devouring a book by Bruce Sterling. “Distraction” it was called. A political diversion set 5 minutes into the future as the cover said. Pretty good. I recommend Bruce Sterling as post-Gibson reading. (In the science fiction community he is known as Chairman Bruce.
First thing off the plane, we got hit by shuckers and jivers. Some knuckle-walking son of Ivan wanted to charge us thirty dollars for carrying our baggage 10 feet. We wanted to get from one terminal to the other of the stunning world-class facility that is Moscow airport. Were we ever shocked to discover that the ticket agent of Aeroflot was in cahoots with the gypsy cab drivers and luggage schlepper to get us to part with about 100 dollars of Tuxmo money. When we asked the woman at the aeroflot desk when the free shuttle bus service was she replied in words not of this time space continuum.
“I never told you to take a bus, now you have to pay for standing twenty minutes talking to information, WHY WHY WHY do you insist on taking a taxi when I TOLD YOU the only taxis here are directly controlled by the mindwarp brainfog hare krishna voodoo no coke pepsi. NEXT PLEASE? TAKE TAXI OR TAKE BRITISH AIRWAYS NEXT TIME STUPID!!”
I simply must tell you, however, that st. petersburg is stunningly beautiful, knock out drop dead gorgeous. They have a ‘respectable river’ here as peter says. I have never seen a river whose current is so fast. It positively assaults the bridges. We are staying not all that far from the Hermitage and the surrounding plazas. This town is laid out on a grand scale, the sky is huge and the sun doesn’t ever quite set. We are in the middle of the ‘white nights’ period. At most, the sun sulks a bit, we have a crepuscular glow for a while and then the sun comes back up. I will go now, I have finally managed to get online but it costs. I am sitting in my underwear as I write this. I thought you needed to know that.
MUNDOBLAINEO IN RUSSIA
SPECIAL REPORT from the hermitage.