February 14, 2002

Greetings all. Here are the latest fruits of my labors watered by the sweat from
my brow, planted in the earth of my site. Sounds disgusting, no? Who wants a sweaty

As I was sitting here thinking of amusing ways to give myself carpal tunnel syndrome and
back problems from sitting in front of a computer screen for eight hours at a time, I thought
“Hello! Let’s translate the site for the benefit of our many non-English speaking visitors! There’s
a jolly idea, old fellow! Huzzah!” And then I wondered why I had started talking like a British
schoolboy from 1918.

I went and did it. There is a website, a venerable institution by web standards, perhaps 3 years old,
called BABELFISH. This name derives from “The Hitch-hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy” in which one would
insert a tiny fish into one’s ear which would translate all known languages for the host. Babelfish is
a site where one may insert text in one language and have something vaguely resembling that text return
after a few minutes. One may also type in the URL of any given site and have the text “translated”.
“Hello, Harry!” I told myself, becoming Harry Potter for a second “there’s a capital idea!” But there is
usually a catch. The translation program got in there and stepped all over my code, man, inserting its
own links and other gremlins which took as long to clean up as it would have done to just translate the
damn thing myself. Also, the literal-minded sheer stupidity of the translation algorithms makes this
site a better destination for surrealist poets than people in need of translation. Of course, this is one thing I love about it.

Oh yes, here is the link before I forget.

So, I have translated the opening page of the site into




There is also a little musical offering on each page just for the hell of it.

My thanks to Isabelle Corbisier who helped me translate at least the French version over Microsoft Messenger.
Quite an experience translating line by line from a chat program.

Now I will demonstrate Babelfish

I have translated this text using Babelfish. Babelfish is an online translating program.
I have 5 nipples. My left foot is an illegal alien. My right foot is lobbying for independence, but I
am only willing to grant it limited autonomy. If you remove the grey scratch panel from my eyes, lo I will
behold the universe in all its splendor. Pass the mashed potatoes, Elvis, I think Gladys is beating the
chickens again.


J’ai traduit ce texte en utilisant Babelfish. Babelfish est un programme en ligne de traduction. J’ai 5 mamelons. Mon pied gauche est un étranger illégal. Mon pied droit incite à l’indépendance, mais je suis seulement disposé à l’accorder ai limité l’autonomie. Si vous retirez le panneau gris de brouillon de mes yeux, bas je behold de volonté l’univers dans tout son splendor. Passez la purée de pommes de terre, Elvis, je pensent que Gladys bat les poulets encore.


He traducido este texto usando Babelfish. Babelfish es un programa en línea el traducir. Tengo 5 entrerroscas. Mi pie izquierdo es un extranjero ilegal. Mi pie derecho está cabildeando para la independencia, pero estoy solamente dispuesto a concederla limité la autonomía. Si usted quita el panel gris del rasguño de mis ojos, bajos yo behold de la voluntad el universo en todo su splendor. Pase las patatas trituradas, Elvis, yo piensan que Gladys está batiendo los pollos otra vez.


Ho tradotto questo testo usando Babelfish. Babelfish è un programma in linea di traduzione. Ho 5 ugelli. Il mio piede sinistro è uno straniero illegale. Il mio piede destro sta incitando per indipendenza, ma sono soltanto disposto ad assegnarla ho limitato l’ autonomia. Se rimuovete il pannello grigio della graffiatura dai miei occhi, bassi io behold di volontà l’ universo in tutto lo relativo splendor. Passare le purè di patate, Elvis, io pensano che Gladys stia battendo ancora i polli.


Ich habe diesen Text mit Babelfish übersetzt. Babelfish ist ein Onlineübersetzungsprogramm. Ich habe 5 Nippel. Mein linker Fuß ist ein ungültiger Ausländer. Mein rechter Fuß beeinflußt für Unabhängigkeit, aber ich bin nur bereit, sie zu bewilligen begrenzte Autonomie. Wenn Sie das graue Kratzerpanel von meinen Augen löschen, niedrig ich Willensbehold das Universum in seinem ganzem splendor. Führen Sie die gestampften Kartoffeln, Elvis, ich denken, daß Gladys die Hühner wieder schlägt.

And then back the other way, one language to the other into

-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+English again! Works great!-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+

I have to translate this text with Babelfish. Babelfish is a program in the line of translation. Ho 5 nozzles. My left foot is an incorrect foreigner. My infuences of the skilful foot for independence, but me am only ready with the assegnarla that I limited autonomy. If cancelled the gray of panel of the draft of my eyes, the bottom of level Willensbehold relative universe in the splendor entirety. To carry out planted potatoes, Elvis, I think that Gladys always strikes the polli.


Blaine L.

Author: Blaine L. Reininger

Blaine L. Reininger was born July 10, 1953 in Pueblo, Colorado. Then he lived a life. By and by, he founded Tuxedomoon with Steven Brown in 1977. He traipsed around America, tuxedomooning until 1980, when he began to traipse around Europe. As a direct result of all of this traipsing, many musical compositions were composed, most of which found their way to some sort of mechanical device capable of reproducing musical compositions. This was mostly for the good. He now lives in Athens, Greece, where he is content.

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