First we take Manhattan, then we take Berlin.

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Wednesday, May 9, 2001

First we take Manhattan, then we take Berlin.

Ciao Italia, guten tag Berlin.

Finally here in the big ol´ city of sin. What we have here is some very elegantly decadent people strumming up and down the street, 21st century as they can be, all pierced all over the goddam place, green and fuchsia mohawk with braided gold pigtail, snakeskin jockstrap, gold platform inflatable sandals riding by on a graphite transverse bicycle listening to techno online and that´s only the women.

Where I am staying used to be no man´s land and is now hoppin humpin throbbin with all kinda street cafes jammed with young and old berliners nursing beers or exotic cocktails of herbs and fruit juices or enormo coffees.

I am in the civilized world again.

Looks like Suzanne, my Berliner baby from the tour, won´t work out. such is life. such is rock n´ roll. we´ll always have Berlin. Stefania, whom I care for a great deal waits for me in Italy. Athena is writing me as well. She don´t seem so bad from this distance. We did have some great sex. We do have a son. Things can probably work out somehow. I know this will all catch up with me and there will be a karmic price to pay. Perhaps I have paid it already and things are moving in retrograde inversion. Perhaps I am just a geek who thinks with his willy.

As you may or may not know, I am here to be an actor with a German director of my acquaintance. I play Henry Fonda in a version of “Once Upon a Time in the West”. I wear a cowboy hat. I smoke a cigarillo, I carrys a six shooter. I play the theme song on my new electrical gee-tar. I do the funky chicken with a chorus line of german girls, greek men in drag speaking spanish, my roommate schlepping around on crutches which I kick out from under him.

Today I was called upon to perform at the very limits of my new acting abilities. I had to do a rehearsal for my first “luuuuuuv scene”. I must dry hump a rather pneumatic young blonde german gal, fondle many taboo areas and genrally comport myself like a swine. I was nervous as hell. The main thing on my mind was “LIMP! soft!” Be professional, think wilted cucumber, think molten popsicle, think about the catholic church. Think about Barbara Bush naked. Think about Aunt Bea naked. Thankfully, this actress is a veteran of this sort of thing. She is also spoken for and that´s good. Her boyfriend is a german body builder who could kick my ass in his sleep. Still fun to have to stick my head in a big ol pair of german tits every day. It´s just my job, boss.

Thus, I suppose my life could be worse. I just left italy where I hung around, saw medieval ruins, played music and bought musical instruments with wild and reckless abandon and now I am forced to come to Berlin and fool around onstage for pay. Every fool thing I do is encouraged. This is light years from Agamemnon. Looks like it might just be….dare I say it….FUN? Now I am off into the wild blue.

What, oh what, has old blaine become? Lecherous old git. Ah well, I am still sort of kind of almost quasi young if you catch me on a good day in the right light. Might as well get this out of my system before time, gravity and a chain of cigarettes that would orbit Jupiter comfortably if put end to end do it for me once and for all.

Author: Blaine L. Reininger

Blaine L. Reininger was born July 10, 1953 in Pueblo, Colorado. Then he lived a life. By and by, he founded Tuxedomoon with Steven Brown in 1977. He traipsed around America, tuxedomooning until 1980, when he began to traipse around Europe. As a direct result of all of this traipsing, many musical compositions were composed, most of which found their way to some sort of mechanical device capable of reproducing musical compositions. This was mostly for the good. He now lives in Athens, Greece, where he is content.

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